Breaking the Cycle

If a man encounters just one humiliating experience during sex, such as losing his erection, this can have immediate results, including anxiety and the release of adrenaline. If this happens repeatedly, you might begin to doubt your abilities, and prefer to avoid humiliation: you might start avoiding sex.

Some men take years to see a doctor, possibly living a lonely life because of this fear of failure – not realising that this problem can be treated. In fact, years later, some men have even forgotten why they stopped having sex in the first place. Many of these men will complain of a low libido. When we investigate their medical history, the problem might not be a lack of desire for sex, but rather a subconscious belief that they’re incapable. These men can respond exceptionally well to treatment of their erectile dysfunction.

This highlights the dilemma: i.e. for most men, the most difficult issue is having to admit that they have a problem at all. It is only in recent years that there has been a focus on medical issues primarily for men. In general, if a man has a personal or sexual problem, he will keep it to himself. He won’t go to his mates at the pub and ask for advice, nor will he approach a complete stranger and pour his heart out. If he is more relaxed about it, he might consult his general practitioner. Our Doctors have developed a rapport and relationship with thousands of men with ED and know how to address this in a caring and sensitive way.

Richard is an electrician:

'I’ve been to three different doctors over the last 12 years,’ he says, ‘and none of them have done anything for me. The first one tells me to ‘Go home and don’t worry about it’ because it’s all in my mind. The second guy didn’t know what to do, so he referred me to someone else who told me to trade my wife in for a new model.'

Some of our patients have already approached other health professionals and been misinformed with comments such as,

• ‘You’re too old to be thinking of that sort of thing’, or
• ‘It’s all in your mind’, or
• ‘You’ve been with the same women thirty years now, so what do you expect?’

This kind of advice can have very negative results and some men simply give up, making no further effort to overcome their problem.

However, those who do actually seek a second opinion can respond very positively to today’s range of treatments.

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